It was July 27, 2013, at around 6:13 pm that I said, “I do” to my beyond beautiful, supernaturally given gift, Natasha Ann Miller. As my friends would say, I had crossed over into the #goodlife! Now being married six months (at the time this was originally written) I can freshly talk from the place of recognizing the things I wish I would have learned before I got married. So, if I had the opportunity to talk to myself one year ago, this is what I would share.
1. Learn not to worry, but to trust God.
If you only knew how much time I took worrying about how God was going to bring my spouse into my life. After graduating from college it was like okay God … I’M READY — and I would repeat that phrase every day in my prayer time. Each minute I spent worrying how she was going to come, or when she was coming, robbed me from enjoying the season God had me in. If you are single and waiting on God for your spouse, please do not waste time wondering HOW God is going to do it, but TRUST that He will do it. Your marriage season will come in God’s timing.
2. Learn how to budget.
It is said that finances are one of the top causes of divorce today. Many think once they get married money will eventually work itself out. WRONG! When you are single, it’s easy to get away with a budget-less life, but once you are married, it is one of the most critical of disciplines. I encourage you to start a budget now, and do some study on personal finances. Luke 14:28 states it so perfectly: “Don’t begin to build until you have considered the cost.” If you can learn this concept while single, you will bypass many arguments during budget time and your spouse will thank you for it.
3. Learn yourself.
Marriage is the process by which two become ONE! Well, it’s a lot easier for those two to become one when you understand the parts of you that refuses to surrender. When you know yourself well, you can acknowledge where you need Christ to make your weaknesses His strength — it makes the merge of two individuals a piece of cake (or, at least a little easier!). The first few years of marriage are most difficult for those that refuse to give up and surrender to God’s inventive method for Christ likeness. Learning yourself is best done in the environment of healthy friendships, volunteering at your local church, and allowing the Word to reveal those hidden things in your heart fighting against selfless living.
The ultimate goal in marriage is to become one with your spouse and Christ, that He might be glorified through your union. Keep these three things in mind as you prepare for your future marriage!
