Calling all control freaks!!! Many of us who grew up in an unstable environment, as a result of poverty, etc., have become addicted to predictability! If this is you, you probably hate surprises and prefer to plan your days down to the minute. Calculated risks might be okay, but sudden, unexpected changes drive you nuts. My friend, you have to let go because your hate for change is ruining your relationships!
If you don’t learn to accept change and even expect it, you’re going to have a long stressful life. Change is the only certainty we have in this life, and you’ll wind up fighting harder to keep things predictable than you will to keep up with the curveballs life throws your way. If you always try to take the safe route, you could miss out on the life God has for you.
The bible says that we walk by faith and not by sight, but control freaks couldn’t fathom such a life and even the thought gives them anxiety. Here are the 3 relationships that are ruined by your need to be in control.
Your relationship with God.
This one takes real discernment because your need to control things might seem like wisdom at first. It’s good that we learn from our mistakes and those of others, but you can’t allow your fear of making mistakes to keep you from living your life to the fullest.
There are some things that God asks us to do that won’t make sense, but we have to be willing to trust Him completely. And, again, discernment is key because you might convince yourself that the enemy is trying to distract you when it’s God elevating you. Reading the word regularly will get you more familiar with God’s voice, and in worship, He reveals His plans to you.
Your relationship with yourself.
People who hate sudden change and crave predictability are extremely hard on themselves. They hate being wrong and will go out of their way not to be. The problem with that is, we’re all human, and there is no way around error. People mess up, life happens, and there’s nothing that any of us can do about it.
Since mistakes are inevitable, control freaks tend to self-loathe. They hate themselves for misjudgments and disappointments. These can be big things in life and work or small things like taking the wrong exit on the freeway.
Your relationships with people.
One of the more obvious ways that your life will be challenged is in your relationships with other people. You’ll hate the idea of someone leaving your life so much that you turn into a people pleaser. People-pleasing is an attempt to control and manipulate a relationship, and it’s very unhealthy. In your mind, you think you’re being “nice,” but in reality, you’re putting in overtime so that no one leaves you. This goes for friendships and romantic relationships. In the end, you resent them because of the effort it takes to maintain the relationship.
God loves you, so trust Him.
One thing about God is that when He wants us to learn something, we often do so through experiences. If you are a control freak that hates change, you will probably go through a lot of situations that require you to trust blindly. This is especially true if you’re praying and asking for help.
So, God removes us from our comfort zone to realign our hearts, and boy, does it hurt! But trust Him. His grace is sufficient for you, and His strength is made perfect in your weakness. And lastly, keep moving forward. One day, you’ll wake up to start a new day, and with joy in your heart, you’ll say, “Thank you, Jesus, I’m ready!”
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