When you’re dating and figuring out what you want in a future spouse, what things come to mind? Most of us focus on looks, status, and character, but what about being purpose partners? Compatibility is about more than them making you laugh — it’s about destiny.
It’s going to be a lifelong uphill battle if you decide to settle for someone who doesn’t have a compatible calling. This doesn’t mean that you have to be in the same field, but the two areas should complement each other. This has less to do with your actual job and more to do with your divine purpose. For example, if you feel called to the youth, but you’re dating someone who doesn’t like kids, that may end up being an issue down the road.
Two hearts with one vision.
It’s important to not only talk about your vision and goals but to also consider what a life together might look like. Sometimes we think that it doesn’t matter and you can have individual paths, but everything that your future spouse commits to will affect you. What if you marry a pastor who’s required to be at the church several times a week, but you don’t feel God is calling you to ministry? Eventually, it’s going to cause some friction.
Here are 3 ‘Purpose Partner’ test questions to ask yourself while dating.
1. Do you have love for each other’s purpose?
Do you see the need and value in what your significant other is called to do? Does it resonate with you? There’s nothing worse than being in a relationship with someone who just doesn’t get it. Maybe you work at a great job during the day, but you tutor underserved children in the evening. If you’re with someone who doesn’t support your purpose in that area, it will be difficult to move forward.
2. Is there any resentment?
Purpose partners cannot compete with one another. If you feel like you are fighting for their attention or that you don’t fit into their life, it’s not going to work. Purpose isn’t always a walk in the park. There will be times when you or your future spouse need encouragement and motivation to continue. But if you’ve been feeling left out or disappointed in general, you probably won’t be able to give them the support that they need.
This could also lead to other problems because if they abandon their purpose, the guilt will spill over and cause tension between the two of you. You have to be in alignment if you’re going to be able to help each other win.
3. Are you able to work as a team?
It’s crucial to be able to flow as a team in your life together. Now, you may not be married yet, but this is something to think about when you’re considering moving toward engagement. Just because there’s attraction and you enjoy spending time together doesn’t mean you’ve found your purpose partner. Do you feel like you have anything to add to their life? What are some of the ways you can work together to fulfill your unique purposes?
This doesn’t mean that you have to drop everything to focus on them, it just means that you should be considerate of the ways you can be a benefit to them (and they should be thinking the same).
You can develop as purpose partners!
Listen, if you’re not feeling all the way there with your significant other just yet, that’s okay! This is just to remind you that there are levels to compatibility. When things are going well, and you’re thinking about possibly taking things to the next level, you’ve got to factor in your calling compatibility. There may be some big differences that drive you apart, but more than likely, you’ll be able to work through it and plan for a great future together.
For more like this, download our FREE eBook, “How Will I Know: 3 Signs You’re Dating the One.”
